magic tricks

 

Friday, March 11, 2005

yesterday was a break from the life i have been leading for a long time.
i went out with her girl.
her name is joan.

She's really nice company and i enjoyed myself lots. i want to tell you what we did and how much fun we had but i cant. i have to help joan keep her secret. But i really enjoyed myself.

Tuesday, January 18, 2005

magic tricks

ever played with sparkle? seen it fizzle out?
what about the almost instantaneous dying out of a flame.
that's just how my determination to study hard died.
instantaneously.
just like that. *boom*

kinda reminds me of magic tricks we used to be so amazed by when i was young. of how rabbits and what nots can just appear n disappear like that. *puff*
well, not surprising to me now anymore.
i m my own magician now. i can make intangible things disappear.
wow. aint i just better than the world's magician or something?. hah.

only problem is, i cant seem to make it re-appear.
and that's big trouble.
gotta buck up, stop fooling around thinking that i've got all the time in the world coz i dont.
and that better get thru my skull soon!

magic tricks

ever played with sparkle? seen it fizzle out?
what about the almost instantaneous dying out of a flame.
that's just how my determination to study hard died.
instantaneously.
just like that. *boom*

kinda reminds me of magic tricks we used to be so amazed by when i was young. of how rabbits and what nots can just appear n disappear like that. *puff*
well, not surprising to me now anymore.
i m my own magician now. i can make intangible things disappear.
wow. aint i just better than the world's magician or something?. hah.

only problem is, i cant seem to make it re-appear.
and that's big trouble.
gotta buck up, stop fooling around thinking that i've got all the time in the world coz i dont.
and that better get thru my skull soon!

Monday, January 17, 2005

Argh!
the dreadful time of my life is coming- the exams!!!!
my preparation-close to 0%,
haven started doing anything yet. i guess the only things that i did was listening in class some of the times, and doing that miserably 2 assignments per unit.
and oh, that could so probably enable me to pass my exams.

i need to do more than that. but starting to study after slacking for almost half a year isnt exactly easy, not to mention that the half year that i was working before school started.

i need discipline. focus. determination.
i thank you for giving me that. for the constant reminder for the need to study. for so willingly sacrificing the time that we could have spent together (opportunity cost or sth i learnt in econs). and i'm grateful for that.

looking forward to the post-exam period though. 17 weeks of freedom. think i wanna go on a holiday with joan or sth. shall start saving up n studying hard.

Thursday, December 30, 2004

goodbye 2004

i've been bugged.
bugged to blog.
havent been blogging in for a long time as i've been realli busy.

school, assignments, christmas, work, him
wonder how i managed to juggle them all. i know. i've neglected some. school for one is something that i've neglected. *oops*

chirstmas is over. and soon will the year. i'm glad that the musical was good. the turnout was great. my dad was there!

havent been concentrating on my schoolwork for sometime. since kl. need to catch up on my work. lagging behind. exams are coming soon. gotta get my act together. no more time to play arnd. need to get serious with my work. not much time left. i want to do well. i need to do well, learnt my lesson with the 'A's. this is my last chance to do well. still upset about the results of my last exams. after uni, don't have much exams after that. new year new resolution. only problem is sticking to my resolution...

Sunday, November 07, 2004

simplicity comes from within

i hate you. okay. i take that back. i don't hate you. hate is too strong a word.
but i don't like the way you're making me feel. i feel so torn between. torn between to extreme feelings that i don't know how to feel and i don't know what am i feeling.
if only feelings could be defined. then you would know how to feel and what you're supposed to be feeling at any particular point in time. then ppl would feel like i feel now would cease to exist.

there are so many things that i want to know. so many things that i would love to see unravel before my very eyes. but sadly, things dont usually happen the way i want them to. coz if they do, then i won't be human.
i sometimes wonder if i m taking things into my own hands and if i am presuming too much, hoping that events will fall into place the way i would like for them to be.
guess life is a simple thing, only to be confused n be made to look messy by humans and emotions. if only i didnt have such feelings. life and things would be so much more simple

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

been almost a month since i updated my blog. guess its been pretty stagnant. so now, time to liven things up arnd here!
and so much has happened i really don't know where or how to start. so this might probably be a really long fragmented entry.

through it all, i've learnt not to underestimate time.
amazing things can happen in a short span of time. things we never thought could happen. i've experienced it. still suffering from post-event syndrome. emotions running high, excitement , fear, exhiliration, joy, uncertain, amazement and the list goes on...
i just cant believed that it happened. and in such a short span of time too. but then again, many things that happen are just so unexpected. guess we always have to be prepared for the unexpected.

just thought of something:
time is something that we take for granted in our lives. we think that we're still young and that the road ahead of us is so long and straight, we won't see the end for a loooooooooooong time. but at this time and age, things are so uncertain, we really never know what could happen. so i guess we should really live our lives well.


i went to nus that day. there was this overwhelming sense of sadness and regret. immediate thoughts that ran through me were 'if only this was my school', ' if only i had worked harder' etc
i realli thought i was over it. i thought that i could jus get on with life without feeling upset all over again. but i guess i was wrong. indeed, time is needed to heal wounds. all kinds of wounds.


then there's this sudden rekindling of passion between me n joan. not realli sudden and it has been on for a few months already. cant realli explain what happened also. but since we parted in jc. we werent that close anymore. but since this year, there's this sudden revival of some sort. not sure why. kinda thought that when school started, we would drift apart again, but i'm realli glad we din. if you ask me, i think we're even closer than before.


thoughts. running through my head, running through my mind.....

Saturday, October 09, 2004

fellowship

today we had a combined young adults gathering. it was not quite what i expected.
maybe that's why we are now called young adults. we were able to mingle arnd rather well. the people were nice. they took plates for us. may seem like a simple gesture but i guess its realli nice of them to do it. like they say, its the thoughts that count. and so we played taboo.
Leah n Noah are soooooooooooooooooo cute n adorable. couldnt stop saying that n when i played with them , their childish innocence n shyness made them even cuter!!
all in all, i'm quite glad i went. guess it was realli a good chance to fellowship!

huNger

during cell group, diana shared that you would never know the meaning of happiness untill you're sad. i totally agree with her. i had an experience that shed light of a similar idea ytd. you never truly appreciate food till you're faced with hunger.
i guess everyone feels hungry at some point of time in the course of each day. but ytd was one of the rare occassion that i experienced extreme hunger. i had a light breakfast in the morning and only had lunch at my aunts place. on my way there. i could feel my body weight lighten due to an empty stomach. i felt so weak. could hardly wait to reach her hse. but i had to buy lunch first. it took me so much effort to walk. when i could finally eat, i realised that my hands were shaking from hunger.

maybe such an experience brings out the gratefulness and thankfulness in me. nowadays food supply is abundant so no one realli appreciates in. but now, i thank God for food and how He has blessed us in this way.. ")